Planet to Perfection

A lot of Perseverance and Ingenuity went into getting this new red rover on its way to Mars.  It has been delayed since the rover has been starring in the new Wall-E film but the rocket launch finally got the green light at Cape Canaveral on July 30, 2020 and it went off... like a rocket!   (Too easy?)  It was perfectly planned propulsion that lead to an impeccable launch.  We will try to hold back our amazement that humans can actually get things into outer space let alone land them on other planets.  Ok, we cant take it... Its soo out of this world!  (Nerd Alert)  The fact that we can land things on other planets is just awe inspiring!  It is on to a new world where this rover hopes to find evidence that some of us are actually descendants of Martians.  Seriously, some people on this planet can not possibly be from Earth.  (MIB are really doing a pretty good job hiding them but some people are just too crazy to be hidden)
This planetary effort was done in collaboration with NASA and the Mars We May Need You Sooner Than We Think Alliance.  This alliance was founded by People That Can See Other People Are Clearly Screwing Up The Earth Coalition.  (Although, maybe its just these Martians living here screwing up Earth because they own a lot of property on Mars and know once Earth is screwed they can make a ton in the Martian real estate game)  Life is a very hard thing to kill but with a little luck humans may just succeed at killing all of it. 
The leaders of Mars were quoted saying "this is one small rover for mankind and one giant annoyance for us.  Why are you so interested in us?  Because we're red?  Is Earth a bunch of planet racist?  Maybe if we were blue you would just be cool and leave us alone but nooo since we're Red you got to drill us and inspect us to see whats wrong with us.  We have a bigger Mons than you, just deal with it.  No need to get jealous that our Olympic size volcano used to shoot hot ash way better than any of the puny hills you got on earth.  You can land here but just dont go all Native American on us claiming something to be "yours" that has existed for a very long time before you got here."
We're hoping in 7 months that the rover (Perseverance) sees red and also a lot of other things when it lands softly on the reddest rocky planet in the solar system.  It will then (after a quick stop at the Mars Deep Red Light district for a "tune" up) release its helicopter (Ingenuity) which will take pictures of the rear of the rover so it can be the first to do the Uranus joke on Mars.  Yea, its a weird thing to spend billions of dollars on but... lets face it we've never heard a bad (or good) Uranus joke, and it will definitely make a couple people laugh! (us)  Red Rover, Red Rover send Perseverance right over.  God speed you interplanetary robot, God speed.